“To have and to hold from this day forth, till death do us part” We have all heard this line from traditional wedding vows. Sometimes trucking marriages don’t make it, and this part of the vow becomes, “To have and to hold from this day forth, till trucking do us part.”
Life isn’t easy. Things get tough when the loads aren’t there. The home time visits are few and far between, and way too short. It all adds up. You need two committed people, it can’t be just one. It has to be both to make marriages work. Trucking marriages are already difficult, but if your spouse isn’t committed, it will never work. Its not always easy to be committed in a trucking marriage. There is always the temptation to turn to someone else.
Marriages are tested a lot more when someone is forced to become a truck driver because there just aren’t the good paying jobs there used to be. You aren’t used to it, the separation can almost be unbearable at times. My first piece of advice is to maintain communication! Do not let the lines go down. I realize you may be hurt or betrayed because your trucker was forced into this career, but keep in mind that they’re not any happier about the separation than you are.
My second piece of advice is to never judge them and think they don’t care about you. If they married you, they care about you and love you. The separation is painful for them too. And even if they don’t show it in the same way you do doesn’t mean they don’t care, and that the situation doesn’t bother them. Saying things like “you don’t care about us” or asking questions like “Do you even still love me?” can do some major damage to your relationship. I almost guarantee you will hurt their feelings.
Don’t ever forget the vows you made when you got married and don’t let trucking do you part. The pain of leaving doesn’t ever go away. It hurts each time you see your trucker pull away. But the pain dulls after they are gone a bit, and disappears when they return back home. Cherish the home time. Love them with everything you’ve got. You’re the reason they keep rolling down the road, putting the miles behind them.
If you have any questions you can catch me on the forum. TruckersWife09