Comments By Stephanie D.

Suck it up cupcake. Isn't that what you told me?

I think the light conversation will come easily enough. I know you know you have family business to deal with - that needs to be covered in phone conversation if you two call each other. Just don't make it that your Driver "needs" to get home to handle everything right away.

We had the water heater (in the attic!) spring a leak. Fair enough, I got home ASAP. But you will be holding the Fort for several weeks without much reinforcement. Mowing lawns, getting the brakes fixed, taking care of school, etc. on your own as much as possible. And your guy needs to be in on this news. He has a job where they will not take kindly to having to high-tail it home every few weeks for some "emergency". (Think Pioneer Woman)

Errol, I have handled everything that has come my way, to the best of my ability. Him being home or not home has not really changed a lot on the "crap that needs done" list. Now it's just that we're going to have to hire someone and pay more instead of him doing it. I am not the kind of woman that needs constant affirmation, all I'm saying is that if women are lead to believe they are supposed to constantly praise their men for being on the road then the men should keep that in mind when talking to their women and reciprocate. Women go nuts for reciprocation lol

There's definitely a fine limit in communication. If either partner is calling the other with just complaints, well, I wouldn't want to listen to it. When partners aren't together they miss out on all the positive stuff that they would normally experience together. I don't think "Oh don't tell him these things he's stressed" is applicable because no, neither partner gets to just not have to hear about the troubles just because they aren't there. But, people complain about the silliest things. Being mindful of what is being complained about and being supportive are both needed. I really recommend that the other partner find a hobby or even a job of their own if they want or can. Something that gets them out of the house around others instead of just dwelling on the same problems all day. I'd rather hear my partner tell me that they went out and walked dogs at a shelter than I'm lonely, I miss you, and all this negative stuff happened at home day in and day out. It's tedious to hear the same complaints every day. Likewise, I'd rather a trucker tell me about the area they drove through and things they saw versus the company did this to me everyday.

I do try to keep it positive but life in general is not always positive. The kid down the street called me a ***** today, I was supposed to run my dad to the store and didn't, I mean it's not like it is anything that freaking major that I should be put down for.

So my guy has been away for a month and a half aside from 12 hrs he got to swing by the house on July 8th. I've been coping, had to post here and get some reassurance that it does in fact get better, and in fact, it has. Anxiously awaiting his week of home time coming up in just a few days!

Anyways, I have been told in this forum and others to try to keep the conversations light, don't tell him about the stressors at home, etc.. Which I think is kind of crap because if I don't talk to my partner about it then someone else will start filling his shoes and no one wants that... I get it that you guys are out on the road, stuck in a truck, dealing with your dispatcher, loaders, etc but I feel like if you lose sight of your lady at home, that is the beginning of the end. Nevertheless, I've taken the advice into consideration and I have stopped complaining (as much) and I am really working hard at being a good trucker wife. Me and the kids are adjusting, school will be starting in the next few weeks, so it won't be quite as noticeable that dad is gone (at least that is what I am thinking)...

My whole point is, that while the wifes are at home trying to make their guy's lives as easy and "light" as possible, the guys need to also remember that while they may have their stressors and are lonely and often dirty, the ladies still need to be appreciated. We want to hear a thank you for holding down the home front. I know you guys are out there busting your ass to make a good living for your family. I know you guys need to feel appreciated too. All I'm saying is while you are out there lonely, your ladies are home feeling lonely too. It is not easy to go from being a 2 parent home to single mom status except still in a weird dynamic of a relationship.

So here I am, reading this forum and trying to be active in it, while I'm at home worrying about school supplies, and clothes, and mowing the grass and fixing the weedwacker.. I'm sure this is all stuff you guys are hearing from your ladies. Just don't forget you are not the only one who needs a little bit of gratitude.

Thank you each and every one of you for working hard to keep your family going. Thank you for working hard to keep this country going. Thank you for dealing with often times less than desirable conditions in order to provide. YOU ARE APPRECIATED. Just don't forget you're not the only one working to keep things going.

Anxiously awaiting your rendition via youtube, Errol!

Congratulations!

Stephanie, my hat is off to you! Your dedication and support for your guy is amazing! I'll just say "Thank you!"

Thank you! Joining this forum has really been a big help for me to understand everything he is going through and get a better perspective!

Just the way the cookie crumbles. Thanks for the advice, getting pretty dam lonely and missing my girlfriend very much. I knew this was going to be some time but I don't realize some people got better treatment due to different trainers/instructors/dispatchers.

I just am keeping my fingers crossed it's going to be worth it. Right now it's just a bit overkill with all the roadblocks so far. Thanks

Hang in there, Jeremy. I'm sure she is missing you too. :)

Congratulations on the career, bud. Me, I'm sort of in the same boat and my mind is in the same place. I threw in an application with Prime Inc this week, then talked to a recruiter the next day and I was in. This was yesterday. I've yet to give her a leave date for orientation, simply because I'm not sure that my mind is 100% completely committed yet for the same reasons as yourself. I asked her to give me a few days to mull it over and I'll get back with her. I've got a woman of about 2 years, whom has three boys, and I'll be honest.. if it wasn't for her, I'd be leaving Sunday.

She swears up and down she can handle it, that she's not worried and knows that OTR won't last forever (she knows I want to try to land a local LTL gig later on down the line for some more home time). She's crazy supportive, but not to excited about it. She knows I hate being in an office all day and everyday like I am currently, and she knows I've always wanted to be behind the wheel. But it's like I mentioned in another thread, I'm giving up a very good for-sure career, for an unknown. I've got no idea what this chapter will bring if I pull the trigger and call the recruiter. I'll be giving up a lot.

As a rookie's wife, I can commiserate with her. It is hard. It is a huge adjustment. My guy has been gone since June 22nd other than a 12 hr visit on the 8th. I can say it has been getting easier. Joining this forum has been a huge help to me. Best of luck to you guys!!

I find this post very interesting. First off I have not seen the movie based on my knowledge of the premise :) Secondly, my guy is doing his TNT as we speak and all he talks about is how many different trainers have tried to get him to go with them, with varying promises of more money, or home time, etc. Maybe he is the exception though, after reading this thread. Appreciate the insight! <3