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Posted: 1 year ago
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Needing advice from truckers and/or trucker wives
To all the truckers out there and/or trucker wives.. How do I cope with my husband being an OTR Trucker while I work from home and take care of our kids?
Here are a few things to consider.. I have a toddler and a stepdaughter (my husband’s child from his previous marriage). My husband used to be an otr trucker. He worked locally when I delivered the baby but then recently decided to go back out on the road again. While he was local, I still felt like I had no help with the kids. Post Partum was extremely tough and honestly I do more with my stepchild than he does and that’s his biological child. I spent months trying to talk to him and finally when he said he was “trying” to change, trying to be helpful, he went back on the road. I’m not sure how distance is going to help. Instead, I still feel alone.
I work primarily from home but I do have a demanding job and I take care of our toddler, plus I watch my stepdaughter every other weekend. It feels like I’m really all alone in this.
Please be gentle and understanding. I’d love to hear thoughts, comments, etc.
Posted: 1 year ago
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Needing advice from truckers and/or trucker wives
I guess I need to be clear about something else. My husband is not financially helping me. Did not financially help when he did work local and is not doing it now.
My SD is 7. My biological daughter is now 1 year old. I am not complaining about post partum years and years after. Post partum was my every day life and my every day feelings and emotions until recently, when I started going to therapy and working on myself.
When my husband worked locally, I worked during the day and took care of our daughter, while he worked. Even if I didnt sleep all night with the baby, I was still up before he went to work to make him breakfast, pack his lunch and be there with him until he left for work. When he came home, I always had hot food ready for him, and guess what? Even when he was home, the kids and home were still my primary responsibility.
My children are not burdens. But I am NOT a single mom. My job and his job is our separate responsibilities. But being that we are a married couple, being that I did not make them by myself, my children should not be just my responsibility. Taking care of the home and all the responsibilities that come along with a home and children should not be my sole responsibility because I am "married". If I was a single mom, I would not be on here asking for advice. If I was a single mom, then the responsibilities would be all mine.
I was always emotionally and physically available to my husband. Always. Always asking if he ate, how hes feeling, how his day is going. He has no problem talking to me. And I never said he wasn't good enough. I simply asked for help. Which I should be able to do. Because again. I am working too and I did not make these kids by myself.
I'm not here to complain about my husband or my life. I'm not here saying that my situation is worse than others. I am aware that other people are in worse situations. As for me, I'm simply just here asking if anyone else is in this situation and if you are, how are you coping with it? I'm trying to look at other points of views and gain an understanding. I'm simply trying to look or ways to mend what feels broken.