QUESTION!!!!!

Topic 17084 | Page 1

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Missy's Comment
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okays so me and my soon to be husband have just started trucking together, so far everythings great. Been busy seen a lot. Been just about everywhere but the lack of sex is killing me. I understand the being tired and not having a lot of time due to being busy but how do you ladies keep it going with yours on the truck? Ive tried starting it. Ive brought it up in converstations. Like seriously what do yall do to keep it going?confused.gif

's Comment
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Apparently noone is willing to give up their little secrets...or they are too embarrassed!

rofl-3.gifshocked.pngrofl-3.gif

Missy's Comment
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wtf-2.gifwtf.gif Well that sucks....

Kemo's Comment
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A big sleeper. Ba ha ha. There has been MANY MANY times where we literally only had just a couple of minutes for any intimacy. We had to learn how to be okay with that and go for it anyway. We both are happier we have. Sometimes though that won't be enough and we just decide to rain check. Not sure how old your relationship is. I think it gets easier to flat out ask "are you too tired for some action?". We both know that when the other answers that yes...indeed their answer is the truth whether it is a yes, no or other answer like "*sigh* I'm sorry but I am upset about something" or not feeling well - ensue quick chat, rain check, sleep. We do laugh now about "man we are such an old couple" (overly comfortable) talking about other things when we are getting started esp when it is the complete opposite of sexy conversation. I guess sometimes we are mixing the fact that we have such little time for real conversation and sex.

There are times where something is upsetting my dude completely unrelated to me in any way or is too stressed/tired from work. He will not be able to get "in the mood" for anything. I believe this is another one of those relationship dynamic questions not exclusive to truckers lol. It really depends on you both as individuals as a couple. Guess the only advice I may offer as options is to either "jump him" or just flat out say when you can have his full attention, "hey babe. I love you. I need you. i need sex". You both may have to try a few different strategies to figure out what will work for you two.

Some more random personal experiences from us: Earlier on in our relationship my guy would have what I call "self destructive" behavior. Sometimes he would feel jealousy when dealing with the fact that my hobbies and interests are mostly "guy things" I would be around a lot of guys. The self destructive behavior included - not wanting to have sex even though I did because he was thinking about these other guys instead of me wanting to have sex with him lol. (the fact that his ex-wife cheated on him and even ditched him and the kids to move 4000 miles away with some other guy REALLY didn't help but I tried my best to remain understanding of his behavior until we fixed it). At some point he had to realize (and I helped) that sure...maybe I might be around other guys, maybe one of them will make me laugh, maybe one of them might help me with something when you aren't there. But "I want YOU! I am wanting/trying to have sex with you". It took awhile but at some point it clicked and stuck...why would I deny my woman sex with me because I am worried that she might be interested in another guy? Makes no sense and is "self destructive" lol.

I also try to stay on point and direct if I need to bring something up that is bothering me. Start: I am sad. Middle: thing I am sad about. End: what I want or reverse want. It took a lot of practice for me but I always try to start a potentially confrontational sentence with "I [feel][thing][want/reverse want]". When people start off [you] and worst follow it with [thing][my feeling] it automatically sets up the other person to be defensive. example sentences "You keep rejecting me when I try to start something, what am I supposed to do?!" vs "I'm feeling rejected sometimes when I try to start, is there something I can do differently?" it's takes the pressure off of them. More often than not the other at this time instead of firing back will think about you and your feelings since it was "I" sentences and say what is really going on to help you feel better if it really isn't about something you are doing wrong. If it IS something you are doing wrong, listen to what they have to say and consider it. Really have merit behind "is there something I can do differently". Hope for the best, plan for the worst (Kemo life rule #3).

DISCLAIMER: I'm no therapist, couples counselor or anything related. Just your friendly neighborhood Kemo :D. Not responsible for any advice taken not panning out how anyone would prefer.

HOS:

Hours Of Service

HOS refers to the logbook hours of service regulations.
Kemo's Comment
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Food for thought: not knowing anything about you guys. Guy response to your question: "a little femininity can go a long way" just a general attempt to look pretty for your man. "maybe some time apart". It's hard to miss someone when they are always there, you kind of yearn for someone if they aren't there all the time. by time apart maybe on your off time go do stuff not together or let him just go wander around without you (one sleeping while other drives doesn't count) lol. But like I said earlier, relationship dynamics, I've no idea what you guys are like as individuals, as a couple, as a team.

Third guy response "try watching some porn" lol

OWI:

Operating While Intoxicated

Susan D. 's Comment
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For me and my other half, it's more about quality over quantity. We both know that we are crazy about each other, but running as a team you actually don't spend much time together. Don't get your feelings all hurt when your partner is just too tired. A good sense of humor goes a long way.

I have a funny story for you. I hog the bed and I sleep like a rock. I also talk in my sleep haha. No denying that lol. So anyway, if I'm already sleeping and he becomes too tired to continue, he'll pull over and park. Often he wil just squeeze in the bunk with his head at the other end..it just gives more room. Anywho, last week he did this. I'm a huge snuggler and he isn't. . No big deal, but when he crawled into the bunk, i was sound asleep reached over and said "mmmm feet". I remember none of that but the running joke ever since has been "hey baby.. i really need those sexy feet of yours" or I'll just say "mmmm feet" and we both crack up laughing.

Don't worry about all that stuff honestly because you two will figure out what works best for you. Oh and I promise the fastest way to get unloaded is to start playing around as soon as you are docked. Soon as your all stirred up, never fail, someone is banging on the side of the truck telling you their finished loading or unloading you.

rofl-3.gif

HOS:

Hours Of Service

HOS refers to the logbook hours of service regulations.
's Comment
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I wonder if the truck stops mind if you share the shower with your significant other...🤔

ChickieMonster's Comment
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Nope they don't mind at all. Just make sure you ask for extra towels.

Susan D. 's Comment
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They don't mind you sharing a shower at all, but i personally enjoy having a separate shower. I'm trying to do my hair and makeup and he's trying to shave so it can be a pita.

's Comment
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And one time we had a room with 2 large shower heads! But ya, I need my own space and time.

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