Advice For A Woman Of A Potential OTR Trucker

Hello everyone!

My fiancé and I have been together for over 6 years now (engaged for 5). He is currently a truck driver locally so he is home by 5 almost every night. He just got his CDL this past year but has recently been offered a position to go over the road through a new company. He would be gone 2 weeks and home 2 days.

This scares me so much. I truly hate being alone and I know it would be very difficult to have such little time together. Thankfully we do not have children so that takes a stress off of us that almost couples have to think about.

However, I work full time and am taking 18 credits this coming semester for my senior year. I know that we will both be under a great deal of stress. I also know that I am not very good at communicating already. My fiancé would talk to me all day if he could but I could go all day without taking to him and be fine. He values verbal communication and I value less verbal and more just being with each other. This being said I know communication will be especially important while he is on the road but I know it will be very difficult for me to be able to communicate with him enough.

He likes to unwind from his day by telling me all about it and about all of his troubles as it is, and I know this will only be more so over the road. I will also be trying to listen to him while coming home from a full day at work to also be studying for 6 college classes.

This will be a very good financial opportunity for us as he will make double what he currently makes. This is savings we are looking to build for our house, wedding, and better future. Earlier this year he left his $23 an hour factory job to get his CDL for a company paying $17 an hour. This was a huge decision for us as it hurt us financially but I wanted to support him through it. It ended up working out wonderfully! He is much happier and actually makes more money than he did at his old job. In this case though he has said he won’t do it because he knows it will put more stress on me and he doesn’t want to keep putting me through that. I know that this is what he wants to do though.

I know we both will be trying our hardest to help each other out through this but I’m just not sure the sacrifices will be worth the extra money. I have a horrible feeling I will be minimizing his responsibilities compared to my school, work, finances, and taking care of our house and pets by myself. I know I can’t do that and that it would be very toxic but I see it happens even to the strongest relationships. If he doesn’t take this job we will be fine. We are still able to save some money and still enjoy our lives. If he does take the job we will be able to meet our goals much faster, he will have a better opportunity, but this will be very challenging on me and our relationship.

Lastly there is the option of my riding with him. With COVID all of my classes are currently online anyways. His double income will allow me to quit my job and focus fully on my senior semester. I could also always get a paid online job related to my field for extra income. This would stop me from gaining any potential in person experiences related to my career and would be a difficult life to adjust to with our animals, but would allow us to be together. This seems like our best option but I am scared it would put me at a disadvantage for my career. My thinking is that I could finish my last semester with him OTR and then take it from there.

Any advice from anyone would be greatly appreciated!

Thank you for reading all of this!

Welcome to our forum Hannah!

I would be skeptical of your calculations about your man doubling his income. I don't know the details, but I wouldn't count those chickens before they've hatched. Trucking is a performance based business. Your man will have to get the hang of this career and be good at it to double what he is making at 17 bucks an hour. Seventeen dollars an hour should come out to about 35,000 dollars. I'd be skeptical if he is going to start out making 70,000 dollars his first year or even two as an OTR driver. Just look into it and make sure you guys understand how it works.

One of our famous lady drivers here wrote an article on OTR relationships. Maybe you could find some help for your concerns by reading it. Just click on this link and you will see the article.

OTR Relationships

Look into LTL. Every LTL company is hurting badly right now and he could definitely capitalize on this opportunity. Home everyday and local work. He can do city driving (which I don't recommend for rookies) or Linehaul (driving hub to hub). Don't jump to the first opportunity you get.