Explain Trucking To Your Spouse

Topic 21824 | Page 1

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Banks's Comment
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I've been married for 12 years. My wife is my best friend and has supported me in every venture I've pursued. There have been a lot. About 4 years ago I got bitten by the trucking bug, but at the time I had a really good job that paid well. I wasn't happy there. I couldn't help but think that it would be selfish of me to leave the job that I hate, but provides really well for my family, to pursue a career that would not only have me away from home but I'd be starting out with less money (if any during training) and there'd be no guarantee of a job once I was done. Long story even longer, I ended up losing that job anyway because it was in NYC and we moved to Pennsylvania. The distance and the requirements of the job just didn't mesh the way I thought it would.

For the last year I've been working these jobs that I hate with a passion and spending a lot of time on this site with a feeling of envy. I decided to just go for it, but when I spoke to my wife she was not happy. The idea of me spending a month in Wisconsin, Iowa or Arkansas only to be followed up with another month or so away with a trainer is her biggest problem. She told me to go to a local school and see what I can do from there. I say does it make sense to spend 5k on something I can get for free from a company I'd want to start out with anyway? I love my wife to death, but I can't stay at a job I hate for another 30 or 40 years because she'd be miserable with me being gone for 2 months. I'd never want to hurt my wife or son, but I'm hurting myself. Since I lost my job in NYC I've had 5 different employers because I'm constantly searching for something challenging, fulfilling and new. I'm ruining my track record and struggling with this decision. Have any of you guys been through something similar?

LDRSHIP's Comment
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My wife hated my decision to become a trucker. She still dislikes it, but it provides for us. She does enjoy it when she gets to go out with me, lol. She has turned to a trucker's wife Facebook group which has helped her tremendously. She has other wives to share a common situation with.

Rob T.'s Comment
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Trucking is a difficult career/lifestyle regardless of what your actual job is. I am a local driver that was fortunate that the need for drivers was so high at this company they paid my way through school and paid me while attending, which is typically uncommon to do. I was very fortunate and have been lucky to have not been involved in any accidents or incidents. The amount of close quarter maneuvering is often times too much for rookie drivers. Although I started local I advise others to not follow my path. It has been a very steep learning curve.

Also. Sure, being home daily is nice but in my opinion most of the time it isn't "quality" time. I'm usually only home for my 10 hour break then off to the next day. In my job I do have weekends off when I make sure to get that quality family time, but with some OTR companies, primarily some flatbed companies, they can get you home most weekends. Honestly, even being a local driver has put a strain on my marriage. I went from a job I was typically only gone from home (door to door) 9 hours, now it's more like 15 hours. My wife constantly is telling me she thinks I should just go OTR because although I'm physically home at night, I usually end up eating dinner, playing with my boys for an hour or so, then going to bed.

I'd highly recommend getting the 1 year OTR, or regional experience then look at going local.

Hopefully those drivers that are living the OTR lifestyle can add more to how they do it while keeping their marriage intact. Best wishes.

Regional:

Regional Route

Usually refers to a driver hauling freight within one particular region of the country. You might be in the "Southeast Regional Division" or "Midwest Regional". Regional route drivers often get home on the weekends which is one of the main appeals for this type of route.

OTR:

Over The Road

OTR driving normally means you'll be hauling freight to various customers throughout your company's hauling region. It often entails being gone from home for two to three weeks at a time.

HOS:

Hours Of Service

HOS refers to the logbook hours of service regulations.
Banks's Comment
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She doesn't understand that a local gig is a bad idea for the reasons Rob mentioned. If I were more familiar with the area I live, I might be a little more bold. I just know my town and that's about it. Imagine dropping 5k to end up being SOL because you hit something.. Being home for just enough time to eat and sleep is something I'm familiar with. That's been my schedule majority of the time I've been here. Now I have a job that pays 19.75 an hour to put stuff in a box and put the box on the belly. The money is great but it's so BORING! I'd rather take the pay cut, do something I enjoy and work my way up to a decent salary. To top it off the only driving school that would work with my work schedule just got busted by penndot for shady testing practices and now 50 former students have to go retest . My face waswtf-2.gif I think it's a bad idea to go there now. A Facebook group and having her come out with me once I get some months under me but it's just that initial hurdle of me being gone for a couple of months. I wanted to go to Maverick. After submitting everything and speaking to a recruiter, they're ready to give me a start date. I have to speak to a TMC recruiter to see what they tell me next.

DOT:

Department Of Transportation

A department of the federal executive branch responsible for the national highways and for railroad and airline safety. It also manages Amtrak, the national railroad system, and the Coast Guard.

State and Federal DOT Officers are responsible for commercial vehicle enforcement. "The truck police" you could call them.

BMI:

Body mass index (BMI)

BMI is a formula that uses weight and height to estimate body fat. For most people, BMI provides a reasonable estimate of body fat. The BMI's biggest weakness is that it doesn't consider individual factors such as bone or muscle mass. BMI may:

  • Underestimate body fat for older adults or other people with low muscle mass
  • Overestimate body fat for people who are very muscular and physically fit

It's quite common, especially for men, to fall into the "overweight" category if you happen to be stronger than average. If you're pretty strong but in good shape then pay no attention.

Chuck 's Comment
member avatar

I can completely understand part of this story since my wife has some reservations of me going on the road just because she will miss me so much while I am gone. That is understandable as I will also miss her but I am not happy where I am at in my current job situation and have always wanted to try trucking for a new challenge to take on. I like the idea of being my own boss when out on the road and learning a new skill at the same time. I believe having my cdl can help to open up some other opportunities for me that I don't have at the moment. I do believe that taking a chance and spending a year learning trucking and honing my skills as a driver will be well spent and really isn't that long when you consider one can spend that time working at a job they don't like in that time also. I hope that you can achieve your dream and your wife hops onboard and supports your decision.

CDL:

Commercial Driver's License (CDL)

A CDL is required to drive any of the following vehicles:

  • Any combination of vehicles with a gross combined weight rating (GCWR) of 26,001 or more pounds, providing the gross vehicle weight rating (GVWR) of the vehicle being towed is in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any single vehicle with a GVWR of 26,001 or more pounds, or any such vehicle towing another not in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any vehicle, regardless of size, designed to transport 16 or more persons, including the driver.
  • Any vehicle required by federal regulations to be placarded while transporting hazardous materials.
Banks's Comment
member avatar

I can completely understand part of this story since my wife has some reservations of me going on the road just because she will miss me so much while I am gone. That is understandable as I will also miss her but I am not happy where I am at in my current job situation and have always wanted to try trucking for a new challenge to take on. I like the idea of being my own boss when out on the road and learning a new skill at the same time. I believe having my cdl can help to open up some other opportunities for me that I don't have at the moment. I do believe that taking a chance and spending a year learning trucking and honing my skills as a driver will be well spent and really isn't that long when you consider one can spend that time working at a job they don't like in that time also. I hope that you can achieve your dream and your wife hops onboard and supports your decision.

Thanks Chuck. She's coming around. In the meantime, I'm putting in applications and talking to recruiters. I'm also researching local schools and seeing what reimburse options I have. There are a whole bunch of avenues to travel down. I want to make sure I pick the best one. I wish you the best of luck, chuck.

CDL:

Commercial Driver's License (CDL)

A CDL is required to drive any of the following vehicles:

  • Any combination of vehicles with a gross combined weight rating (GCWR) of 26,001 or more pounds, providing the gross vehicle weight rating (GVWR) of the vehicle being towed is in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any single vehicle with a GVWR of 26,001 or more pounds, or any such vehicle towing another not in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any vehicle, regardless of size, designed to transport 16 or more persons, including the driver.
  • Any vehicle required by federal regulations to be placarded while transporting hazardous materials.
G-Town's Comment
member avatar

FYI...

Why I Prefer Paid CDL Training

The below links are a recommended read for both you and your wife...

Becoming A Truck Driver: The Raw Truth About Truck Driving

Truck Driver's Career Guide

CDL:

Commercial Driver's License (CDL)

A CDL is required to drive any of the following vehicles:

  • Any combination of vehicles with a gross combined weight rating (GCWR) of 26,001 or more pounds, providing the gross vehicle weight rating (GVWR) of the vehicle being towed is in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any single vehicle with a GVWR of 26,001 or more pounds, or any such vehicle towing another not in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any vehicle, regardless of size, designed to transport 16 or more persons, including the driver.
  • Any vehicle required by federal regulations to be placarded while transporting hazardous materials.
Banks's Comment
member avatar

FYI...

Why I Prefer Paid CDL Training

The below links are a recommended read for both you and your wife...

Becoming A Truck Driver: The Raw Truth About Truck Driving

Truck Driver's Career Guide

Thanks G. I'll definitely sit down with my wife and check those links out.

CDL:

Commercial Driver's License (CDL)

A CDL is required to drive any of the following vehicles:

  • Any combination of vehicles with a gross combined weight rating (GCWR) of 26,001 or more pounds, providing the gross vehicle weight rating (GVWR) of the vehicle being towed is in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any single vehicle with a GVWR of 26,001 or more pounds, or any such vehicle towing another not in excess of 10,000 pounds.
  • Any vehicle, regardless of size, designed to transport 16 or more persons, including the driver.
  • Any vehicle required by federal regulations to be placarded while transporting hazardous materials.

HOS:

Hours Of Service

HOS refers to the logbook hours of service regulations.
Truckin Along With Kearse's Comment
member avatar

Youz Guyz (said in my Jersey accent) need to.really show your wives some appreciation! It must be awesome to have a woman want and love you that much.

I would have been like "See ya. Have fun and deposit the money in the bank account. i get freedom from you for two whole months and get to go on shopping sprees wothout you knowing??? wow cool".

Kiss your wives tenderly tonight. smile.gif

OWI:

Operating While Intoxicated

Banks's Comment
member avatar

Youz Guyz (said in my Jersey accent) need to.really show your wives some appreciation! It must be awesome to have a woman want and love you that much.

I would have been like "See ya. Have fun and deposit the money in the bank account. i get freedom from you for two whole months and get to go on shopping sprees wothout you knowing??? wow cool".

Kiss your wives tenderly tonight. smile.gif

They need to show us some appreciation!! I'm kidding ,don't hit me rofl-3.gif I appreciate her and would do anything for her. I realize how lucky I am and how special she is. It's just hard to be at a job you hate. Especially when there's something else you'd rather be doing. I could deal with a job I hate if I was still trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I don't want to be away that long either, but I understand the sacrifices now pay off later. It's hard to not make decisions for right now. You have to put the blinders on and stay focused to get where you want to be. It'll suck in the moment but be worth it later.

OWI:

Operating While Intoxicated

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