How Do I Get Out Of This?

Topic 20151 | Page 2

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Road Rash's Comment
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I wouldn't think you'd get in trouble for it but I don't think either one of you would want the company to know about this. That's not going to help either one of you.

Yeah thats what I'm thinking too. Maybe I should of waited to tell her but she was starting to talk about going team after I got done training, felt like I was getting locked behind bars when she said that. Maybe I'll have to play along for a little while then drop her when I get done with training. I'm such a idiot.

Old School's Comment
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My Dad used to have this saying that I just didn't understand when I was young. Now that I'm a grown man, it makes a lot of sense, and I think you have found out why he used to say it.

He would say... "Son, never dip your pen in the company ink."

You need to apologize to this woman and blame it all on yourself. Tell her you are weak and you foolishly gave in to her advances. Let her know you didn't mean to hurt her, but you've got to move on and pursue your solo driving career.

Assure her that no one will hear about it at the company as long as she gets you back to the terminal by such and such a date. Let that be the end of it and be kind but firm. Let her know if that can't be accomplished then you are going to squeal like a pig.

Trust me, that will handle this matter. I'm pretty sure this isn't her first time of predatory like behavior. She will do what is needed to protect herself. She might act hateful, but she will get you back so you can upgrade to solo.

Terminal:

A facility where trucking companies operate out of, or their "home base" if you will. A lot of major companies have multiple terminals around the country which usually consist of the main office building, a drop lot for trailers, and sometimes a repair shop and wash facilities.

Road Rash's Comment
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Now that is the part that we were missing. Have you thought maybe that she is scared you might report her to HR?

Maybe she's afraid idk. I would not do that, it's too embarassing. More like she is just upset b/c rejection. Like I said I thought it was just a hookup for a while not a "relationship" thing. She's older so maybe it's different idk. I defiantly need to stop with older women, it's getting to be a habit, told myself to stop a while back but it keeps happening, just don't meet girls my age as much or they're not interested.

What would HR do anyways? Wouldn't we both get in trouble? I don't really want that.

Road Rash's Comment
member avatar

My Dad used to have this saying that I just didn't understand when I was young. Now that I'm a grown man, it makes a lot of sense, and I think you have found out why he used to say it.

He would say... "Son, never dip your pen in the company ink."

You need to apologize to this woman and blame it all on yourself. Tell her you are weak and you foolishly gave in to her advances. Let her know you didn't mean to hurt her, but you've got to move on and pursue your solo driving career.

Assure her that no one will hear about it at the company as long as she gets you back to the terminal by such and such a date. Let that be the end of it and be kind but firm. Let her know if that can't be accomplished then you are going to squeal like a pig.

Trust me, that will handle this matter. I'm pretty sure this isn't her first time of predatory like behavior. She will do what is needed to protect herself. She might act hateful, but she will get you back so you can upgrade to solo.

That is funny "never dip your pen in the company ink"!

You're right, this is what I'll do. I already told her I wasn't trying to hurt her and I like her but the age difference is getting to me. I didn't say anything about telling anyone at the company or HR or anything but I didn't think about doing that anyways. But maybe thats why she's freaking out. I'm just worried she's making up stories about me to training or dispatch.

"Predatory" prolly is a good word too. I was wondering why she wanted to train me when there's a couple women who were looking for trainers. She said she doesn't train women so maybe I know better why that is now huh.

I really hope I can get this over soon. Really I think I have enough miles now but she keeps saying I need a little more time before she can sign off. I should of kept track of the miles better. She's gonna go nuclear if I say I'll squeal like a pig though. I'll have to plan this. She might just kick me off the truck at this truck stop. I don't have that much stuff on her truck though.

Terminal:

A facility where trucking companies operate out of, or their "home base" if you will. A lot of major companies have multiple terminals around the country which usually consist of the main office building, a drop lot for trailers, and sometimes a repair shop and wash facilities.

Dan R.'s Comment
member avatar

Wow.

My two cents would be to tell the company. You might get in some trouble, but they'll end up finding out about her eventually and it'd be much easier on your career to be out in front of it rather than having the company's inevitable investigation come back asking why you didn't say anything. Beyond that, man, I don't know. That's one heck of a position you've found yourself in. Erm... no pun intended.

Truckin Along With Kearse's Comment
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If she tries to prevent you from upgrading, ask the company to have another trainer evaluate you. They will.

Her having any kind of sexual interaction with a trainee is sexual harassment and trust me when I tell you the company does not want that word thrown around in today's political climate. As the trainer she is the one responsible for the truck. She is the one at fault. Prime made me go through hours of classes on harrasment and sexual harassment with three different lecturers before i could find train. SHE doesn't want you bringing it up.

And what makes you think you are so special that you are her first "relationship". My guess is she has had a few others in the.past. I would imagine men don't report it the way women do. But she is wrong. Dead wrong.

Did you know each other before the company and she agreed to train you? Or did you meet at the company? That probably makes a difference.

Whether you tell them or not is up to you. I would probably wait until after I went solo cause if she is repeatedly putting young guys in situations where she is intimidating them with their career path, she needs to be stopped. If she does try to interfere with your upgrade, ask for another opinion to evaluate you.

My guess is she is hurt over rejection. Playing up to her might back fire on you. Being honest with your dispatcher might be the way to go. What if she cries raoe or something? People are nuts. You never know what they are gonna do.

And not all female trainers are like that lol

Dispatcher:

Dispatcher, Fleet Manager, Driver Manager

The primary person a driver communicates with at his/her company. A dispatcher can play many roles, depending on the company's structure. Dispatchers may assign freight, file requests for home time, relay messages between the driver and management, inform customer service of any delays, change appointment times, and report information to the load planners.
Rick S.'s Comment
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Speechless.

This one took some twists & turns...

Rick

Bill F.'s Comment
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Either shut your mouth and soldier on or get the hell off that truck before she really screws you. Nobody in power can afford to ignore this woman if she cries rape, and you will be fighting a losing battle even if you ultimately win. Never combine romance, even casual hookups, and work...

Road Rash's Comment
member avatar

Wow.

My two cents would be to tell the company. You might get in some trouble, but they'll end up finding out about her eventually and it'd be much easier on your career to be out in front of it rather than having the company's inevitable investigation come back asking why you didn't say anything. Beyond that, man, I don't know. That's one heck of a position you've found yourself in. Erm... no pun intended.

Yeah I'm not too smart sometimes I admit. Like I said, not the first time for me. I must have a sign on my back or something that only older women see. I never figure it out until its too late.

Now I'm not sure whether to tell the company or just try to work it out.

Dm:

Dispatcher, Fleet Manager, Driver Manager

The primary person a driver communicates with at his/her company. A dispatcher can play many roles, depending on the company's structure. Dispatchers may assign freight, file requests for home time, relay messages between the driver and management, inform customer service of any delays, change appointment times, and report information to the load planners.
Road Rash's Comment
member avatar

Either shut your mouth and soldier on or get the hell off that truck before she really screws you. Nobody in power can afford to ignore this woman if she cries rape, and you will be fighting a losing battle even if you ultimately win. Never combine romance, even casual hookups, and work...

Like I said to Rainy that's the problem. Either I go tell now and get off her truck or I have to figure out how to keep her calm till I graduate. I'm not sure I can calm her down, she was pretty mad this morning and hasn't talked to me all day. I'm afraid to go back to the truck honestly but I have to later tonight since we have to pick up at 0400 and it's my turn to drive. I can't sleep in the trucker lounge lol.

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