Bad Experience Or Am I The Problem?

Brian please read and re-read G’s last comment. It is very on point.

You will encounter all types of folks in life, as well as this industry. A old navy chief told me too remember two words many years ago. Flexiabilty and verseatility. Both serves well in life.

As human beings we are all different. We learn and experience things differently. We also tend to surround ourselves with people of like personalities, experiences, etc. That is our comfort zone.

In this business you will experience being out of your comfort zone alot. You have to set yourself up how to handle that. You will need to adapt, sometimes often to varying enviroments. Your personal succuss will depend on that.

Like G town...Boundries are important.

Boundries should be respected, some you just dont cross. Several of these are unspoken. Most normal people just instinctively not to do it.....RIGHT? Many here in my opinion were crossed and unprofessional. This isn't the 9th grade, its work, a job and a dangerous one at that.

Not saying there isn't two sides to a story but some things should not be done. Especially in a training situation where innocent people could lose their lives or damage a career for life.

Maybe a good trainer would have been expecting this to happen at the yield sign. Maybe even looking ahead the appropriate distance. As was stated earlier, as being a common occurrence. Maybe if the trainer would have been sharing their wisdom and how to handle this situation as it was occurring instead of just letting it happen and talking some bs after the fact, the trainee could have acted appropriately and would not have had that bad experience.

You are right there are two sides to every story. Because if I were the trainer in this situation. I would have felt that I failed; apologized to the trainee, and went on to express being thankful no one was hurt. Then explained the reasons why this was an unsafe move, and to avoid doing this in the future.

Oh....and OP I am not advocating violence, but the way you explained it. There was standoff or an open invitation of a boxing match.... When combined with the previous circumstances; I would have happily accepted the offer. Calling the office is not for me, would rather just nip it in the bud, directly at the source and will fight at the drop of a hat and have always been this way. Got it honest, from my uncle....I dont seek it out mind you, and am always respectful of others; but when offered , like I said earlier, will happily oblige you.

Davy A. Glad you are doing well...still following you.

Thanks G-Town.

My biggest obstacle is the fact that I worked in another industry for 26 years managed and trained for 20 of those years. My expectations are probably not the same as the 3 gentleman I informed you about. I made mistakes and tried my best to learn from those mistakes in regards to training people. While being trained I think my biggest problem is that I'm holding them to standards that I've tried to practice. I always felt that you should lift people not push them down. When I trained, I made it a practice to train not belittle, not be condescending, or be controlling. I saw all this in all 3 especially #3. It became clear to me that these guys were awesome drivers but poor trainers.

Someone I respect pointed out my feelings on the training because they are aware of my previous carrier. They informed me that my expectations of their training is probably unfair. If I'm going to be a driver this is something I will have to come to terms with. However, I have spoken to other drivers and they informed me that their are some awesome trainers out there. I don't doubt that. I'm positive that I'm being stubborn, but I also know when I'm being disrespected. This really was displayed by trainer 3. He made attempts to cross boundaries that you just don't cross with people. I felt it was best to walk away at that point. Thanks

Brian...

It’s up to you to adjust to them, not the other way around. Do not hold others to your standards. Training is but a minute; continue to get hung up on minutia, focused on how you would instruct, and you will miss something. Humble yourself and focus on being a student and not a critic. Very few trainees go though three different trainers. Remember, this is a protracted job interview. You have set a trend that your company may not accept or consider desirable.

Adjust. Check your ego. Adjust and finish this. I’ve said all that needs to be said.

I am reposting a blog I wrote years ago...

It’s applicable. The Ego is Often a Student’s Downfall

Brian, Wrangler and Davy, I recommend reading this. It’s truth. I hope you all can learn something from it.

Good luck.

Got my coffee, walked Monty, did 732 miles in 10 hrs 40 mins AND I've read all the comments....still strange to me. I checked out the moon, it is not anywhere close to being full.

Laura

Does your truck have a governor?

This is the worst part of the job. I can't believe i not only got through it, but did it. I was on A truck with A trainer for about 7 to 8 weeks i believe then I got my own Truck. He barely had over A year driving and came from A military background so it was quite the ordeal to say the least. The last 3 weeks we barely said one word to each other. I drove while he slept and vice versa. I figured out quickly he didnt know near as he thought He did about everything including truck driving . I let some things He said slide in the beginning until i wasnt taking it anymore. Venting on these forums or in general helps a little bit, but my suggestion is to stick up for yourself and tell the Person how You feel and think about what He is doing or saying for your own peace of mind. Most likely the Person will deny Hes doing anything wrong but my suggestion for You is to set some boundaries. What your going through is difficult enough. Especially the last story when your trainer said something to You about texting during your 10 hour break or when You were both asleep. You will never see these people again after You get your own Truck and its obvious your never going to be friends with them so my suggestion for your own well being and peace of mind is to speak up and stick up for yourself. Don't let anyone rent space in your head or make your life miserable. We do a good job of that ourselves some days. I'd tell Him exactly what He did and how it affected You. These trucks arent big enough for one Person let alone two. All i can say is this is the absolute worst part of the job if your introverted.

Wrangler87 and I would have gotten along just fine if we were in that situation. I agree with what You said and how You said it. From my 50 years living on this planet ive come to realize this:

People are usually either about respect or about control. Being about respect comes very easily for Me. Some People have very high self-importance. Some People are completely unaware of what they do wrong and would never utter something as simply as i apologize ever. Im 50 Years old and ive never heard either of my older brothers apologize or admit they were wrong ever in my entire life. Needless to say we go very long periods of time without talking and arent close at all anymore. I constantly improve and get better at everything i do including personal relationships. Not all People abide by that creed.

Like G town...Boundries are important.

Boundries should be respected, some you just dont cross. Several of these are unspoken. Most normal people just instinctively not to do it.....RIGHT? Many here in my opinion were crossed and unprofessional. This isn't the 9th grade, its work, a job and a dangerous one at that.

Not saying there isn't two sides to a story but some things should not be done. Especially in a training situation where innocent people could lose their lives or damage a career for life.

Maybe a good trainer would have been expecting this to happen at the yield sign. Maybe even looking ahead the appropriate distance. As was stated earlier, as being a common occurrence. Maybe if the trainer would have been sharing their wisdom and how to handle this situation as it was occurring instead of just letting it happen and talking some bs after the fact, the trainee could have acted appropriately and would not have had that bad experience.

You are right there are two sides to every story. Because if I were the trainer in this situation. I would have felt that I failed; apologized to the trainee, and went on to express being thankful no one was hurt. Then explained the reasons why this was an unsafe move, and to avoid doing this in the future.

Oh....and OP I am not advocating violence, but the way you explained it. There was standoff or an open invitation of a boxing match.... When combined with the previous circumstances; I would have happily accepted the offer. Calling the office is not for me, would rather just nip it in the bud, directly at the source and will fight at the drop of a hat and have always been this way. Got it honest, from my uncle....I dont seek it out mind you, and am always respectful of others; but when offered , like I said earlier, will happily oblige you.

Davy A. Glad you are doing well...still following you.

I agree Brian. I believe you can improve on everything you do in this life.

Thanks G-Town.

My biggest obstacle is the fact that I worked in another industry for 26 years managed and trained for 20 of those years. My expectations are probably not the same as the 3 gentleman I informed you about. I made mistakes and tried my best to learn from those mistakes in regards to training people. While being trained I think my biggest problem is that I'm holding them to standards that I've tried to practice. I always felt that you should lift people not push them down. When I trained, I made it a practice to train not belittle, not be condescending, or be controlling. I saw all this in all 3 especially #3. It became clear to me that these guys were awesome drivers but poor trainers.

Someone I respect pointed out my feelings on the training because they are aware of my previous carrier. They informed me that my expectations of their training is probably unfair. If I'm going to be a driver this is something I will have to come to terms with. However, I have spoken to other drivers and they informed me that their are some awesome trainers out there. I don't doubt that. I'm positive that I'm being stubborn, but I also know when I'm being disrespected. This really was displayed by trainer 3. He made attempts to cross boundaries that you just don't cross with people. I felt it was best to walk away at that point. Thanks

You definitely will become A truck driver if You want it. Definitely doable. I know you came here to vent to get You through another day or another hour or whatever the case. I guarantee there is A trainer out there You can coexist with. I wouldnt up with being miserable either. The fact these companies expect two grown Men do drive in the same Truck all day together then sleep in bunk beds is ridiculous. I cant believe i did it 6 years ago. I honestly dont think i could now. It did kind of go fast though and ive never had to do it again 6 years later.

Thanks 87 Wrangler and Don.

Everything I stated before is factual. The 1st trainer was abusing his power according to the 1st company that I went to. They investigated looked at the video and students came forward on my behalf without my involvement. I was asked to return but decided against it after being pulled in the office by the trainer and his manager. This left a bad taste in my mouth being accused of things that did not happen.

I went to the next company and the trainer snored very loud do to a medical condition. I failed to mention in my previous novel that he lost 5 other students due to this issue. I think he was upset that I got off his truck and shed this problem to light again. The company and the trainer made me aware of the 5 other students.

The 3rd trainer was friends with the 2nd trainer. When the 2nd trainer acted very aggressive at a truck stop in Arizona the 3rd trainer acted like I should take it. I firmly believe that the 2nd trainer was using repressed anger about the snoring. I stood up to the snoring trainer and it was not well received. I informed the 3rd trainer that I felt his friend is a trainer and myself a student that his behavior was inappropriate. Once this happened things got much worse as in my previous posts. According to him I was doing well till this took place. He informed me that I probably would not make in trucking. As I posted before he did several other things. I did everything the trainers told me to do without complaint. I felt my dignity and humanity was under attack because certain people feel superiority is more important to them than actually training.

As I stated before trainer 3 let me know that trainer 2 did not like me and stated that he didn't know what to think of me. I'm introverted and both of them are extroverted which is no ones fault. I tried to tweak my personality a bit but it did not work. I'm a very serious person and they did not like that. In my mind none of that should matter. I'm the student and they are the trainer. In my opinion being there, trainer 3 tried hard to press me to give in on not me being myself. I even told him that I was doing EVERYTHING he asked but people should be allowed to be themselves. He told me without hesitation "Not on my truck". After 16 days of this with 13 to go I could not take it anymore.

Luckily I have a friend that is trying to find me a trainer. He found someone I know and knows my personality. Hopefully all this will come to fruition. If it doesn't work out then I'm going to keep trying. I'm damn proud that I obtained my CDL as I know all of you are. I want to be a driver like all of you are. I want to say one day that I'm damn proud to be a truck driver like I know you all are. I need a job not personality conflicts. For those that have given me positive posts I thank you. For those that question my story or post laughs at me I thank you as well. You are all a prime example of why truck drivers make this country so great. Thanks