A Thank You, And A Promise To Our Community

Mark Lee said:

As in recovery, bad things can happen when people don't make "good" choices. But walking that fine line between giving good advice firmly with compassion ultimately is what will REALLY set up apart from the others.

Interesting - I pick up 19 years back on 12/7 - 31 years off the "hard stuff" myself.

And sometimes I tend to see things through the lense of how I deal with people "in the rooms". I have two "reps" - the "public persona" of SickRick - then the one where I share on the steps (which blows people minds - I share in a way that even the most confused can understand).

At any rate - part of my "angst" at the harshness we are discussing here, must also be look at another way.

The person we are being "harsh too" (justified or not) - IS NOT THE ONLY PERSON READING THE POSTS. We take for granted that there are THOUSANDS OF LURKERS here, as well as registered users that just read, as well as occasional contributors - as well as the people who are here all the time. Our respected long-time users, mods, etc. I mean - I think Brett is the only person who's been on the forum longer than me (as a continuous member) and I'm 10+ years.

So it's not JUST US - but THOUSANDS that are reading some of the stuff that gets posted on the "contentious discussions" - they read, they say "jeeze, just another bunch of egotistical a-holes", and WE LOSE THE OPPORTUNITY TO HELP OTHERS.

There another "12 Step Saying" (since Mark brought it up) - PRINCIPLES BEFORE PERSONALITIES. Everyone has an ego, and a "self image" - which carries over into the IMAGE WE PROJECT TO OTHERS - especially on a "faceless internet forum". I've made a few friends here, people I talk to offline occasionally - even a few way older members that have been gone for years. And a few "lurkers" that have found me on FB and communicate with me there.

And I'm not saying that some people get so frustrating, that we just want to give them a "virtual b-slap". Just that, as a trucking site that has one of the best reps on the interwebs - we need to HOLD OURSELVES TO THE HIGHER STANDARD that got us to where we are today. I'd rather hear folks say - GO TO TRUCKING TRUTH to get the honest answers and years of experience in a friendly forum - than hear: yeah, that place is just like the other cesspools.

Being that we cannot edit or delete things we say as an afterthought - THINK BEFORE YOU PRESS SUBMIT. There's been a few times where I'm tempted to jump into these discussions, and I hit PREVIEW - shake my head and say "yeah, I REALLY DON'T NEED TO SAY THAT" - it "return to general forum", and move on.

WE CAN DO BETTER - WE NEED TO DO BETTER - and WE WILL DO BETTER. Now that we are having a discussion on HOW WE CAN DO BETTER.

Rick

Old School wrote:

Sometimes somebody will bait us into a conversation. I'm refusing to respond to New Beginning's question, "I don’t see why a driver can’t be a lease driver (self employed dream) to be in more control of their schedule." See how big a Man I'm trying to be?

I agree with this. And know exactly where Old School is coming from...

My overall concern here? Some forum members will attempt to take advantage of the "kinder-gentler" approach we are adopting. Considering it open-season; like "anything goes". Ummm, I don't think so...

I am not going to get "into-it" beyond a very simple statement on trucking topics:

We do not teach, advocate, or support your approach or claim (providing fact as to "why"). Although it may have worked for you and/or you may strongly believe it will work, please refrain from advising others to take the same path. We wish you the best of luck.

Simple. So...my reply to New Beginning will go like this:

NB I respect why you may see it that way. It's easy to get caught up in the perceived, superficial benefits of Leasing a Truck. But, unfortunately we have countless examples of Lease Operation failures that we'd be happy to point you to in the archives of Trucking Truth. If you still don't see "why", then all we can do is extend best wishes, and make it clear to everyone we cannot advocate Leasing as the best path to attain trucking success and happiness, especially (with emphasis) for rookies.

SImple.

And to Rob D's observation and idea?... No thanks. Hopeful you were actually kidding. If you weren't? I'm really sorry to read "that" is your perception of me and your primary "take-away" from the message I was trying to convey.

Given that you appear to relish "heated contrarian exchanges," I have often thought about how I would like to engage you should we ever meet.

Gentlemen....welcome to heated contrarian exchange club. The first rule of heated contrarian exchange club is: you do not talk about heated contrarian exchange club.

I'm sure Rob was joking, but he probably enjoys a healthy and passionate debate from time to time, as do most of us.

"Trucking Truth: The Movie" ?

And to Rob D's observation and idea?... No thanks. Hopeful you were actually kidding. If you weren't? I'm really sorry to read "that" is your perception of me and your primary "take-away" from the message I was trying to convey.

I was mostly joking. If we were to meet, I would prefer to have genuine conversation rather than argue with you.

It was more in the context of recognition of your tenacity to your positions and your command of language in expressing yourself. At times it can be rather surgical.

My perception of you is not that you like to argue. Rather, as you stated, you are passionate about your opinions on trucking topics and don't back down from those whose challenge those opinions.

"ratchet-it-up" if an individual or individuals dare to spar with me

My take away from the message of your post is:

The "tough love" you have used in the past was intentional because you wanted to make sure that the listener, and perhaps other readers on the forum, knew the truth. But that if your delivery detracted from that purpose, then maybe reconsidering your delivery might serve your purpose better.

I have learned a lot from you in a short time and hope that I can continue to rely on your experience and knowledge.

Rob.

Rob D replied:

If we were to meet, I would prefer to have genuine conversation rather than argue with you.

My preference as well. Thank you Rob.

I think some of the issues hapoen when new people who do not know us or our quaifications question us. We must remember, they do not know us.

I stated on another thread that I loved Old Schools podcast. It allowed me to "get to know him". I kinda think it would be cool for the mods to have something giving our credentials. May e a podcast hearing our voices and tones. Otherwise, a new person just thinks "who does this jerk think he is"?

I guess we could do it on our profile pages? just some thoughts.

As a noob , this post has been an encouraging read. Thanks again for the tip about Tony Roberts Brett, i listened a bit to him this week. helped me out. Thanks so much for the kind words of encouragement. Kearsey, read my latest reflections post, sums up what you have been telling me about not feeling bad about needing 4 tries to get my CDL. Top performer and the one shot guy in my class is basically saying he is going to leave his job......

I really need to pay attention to you guys more often.......

Given that you appear to relish "heated contrarian exchanges," I have often thought about how I would like to engage you should we ever meet. Here's my idea.

A couple of years ago, I was on the other side of that exchange. See it here:

Being A Trainee At Prime Is An Awful Experience

It was the best thing that ever happened to me as far as my career goes. If I would've ran off because I was offended, I may have never gotten the opportunity I did to spend the day with him.

His passion for this business and to help was on full display that day. He walked my through his pretrip and answered any and every question I had with a detailed thoughtful answer. Things I was wondering about were corrected and I could see why I was wrong. There was no heated argument and there was nothing condescending about it.

Tone gets lost in text so a lot is left up to the reader. If you remove emotion and just read the text, there shouldn't be any hard feelings.

Even Brett had some tough love for me here. Reading this really took me back.

It was the best thing that ever happened to me as far as my career goes. If I would've ran off because I was offended, I may have never gotten the opportunity I did to spend the day with him.

I have learned a lot from this forum. Probably the most that I have learned, is what I don't know.

I try to learn as much as I can from this forum so that I am prepared when I finally show up to orientation. I participate more to get feedback on my understanding and offer my thoughts when I think they might be relevant.

I was speaking to someone yesterday who feels strongly that unless you have driven a significant amount and dealt with the reality of trucking, you don't really "know" trucking. I admitted that I am really a "non-driving f***k."